“Mon, my water broke!” It was my sister on the phone. She sounded half scared, half excited.
“What!?” I was driving home from work and I screeched to a halt.
I knew from the sound of her voice that it was not good. But knowing my sis, I knew she would go get worked up over the silliest things. This is bad. And so not the time for it. Why did their silly Sintex water tank have to go mechanically weak now?
“Did you call someone about it?” I asked
“Yeah! I called Abey” That’s my Bro-In-Law.
“Good, what did he say?” I asked
“He is excited, obviously!” she answered, sounding as though I had said something stupid. (Well, in her defense, can’t really blame her for thinking that!)
He is excited? What for? Dude! I know you are a damn good engineer and architect, but this is not the time to get excited about a household chore! After all, my sis was in her final weeks of pregnancy and she needed all the care and support she could get without her husband drooling over fixing a doomed water tank!!
“Okie…” I paused. I needed some who I could rely on to take charge of the situation without adding undue stress to my sis.
“Put Appa on the phone” I told her. My parents were visiting them so as to help her during these testing times. Like I mentioned, she needed all the support she could get!
She passed the phone to Appa.
“Hello, Yes, we are going to the hospital” Appa said.
What! Why are they going to the hospital for this? Maybe they know the janitor, and they are going to ask for this help/expertise on the subject.
“Oh! You are going to get the janitor?” I asked
“Janitor? What for? We are off to see the doctor!” He replied.
The doctor? Did they mean Dr FixIt? Or someone else? Maybe they need the dexterous hand of the doctor to get it fixed.
“Okie… when will u get back with him?” I asked
“Get back with him? Are you crazy? We don’t have the time! We are driving to the hospital for the treatment!” I could sense Appa reaching the end of his patience.
I wanted to cool Appa down. After all why was he getting so overexcited and going hypersonic on the phone? Its just a damn water tank!
“Appa cool down… you cannot possibly be thinking of driving the tank all the way to the hospital!” I tried to reason with him.
That did it. He blew it.
“How dare you say that! How could you even think of saying that! Couldn’t you atleast think of your sis’s condition?” He scolded me. I dint know we men could be so passionate about something as mundane as a water tank! Man oh man! This is it. I’m doomed. Ill be disinherited for sure…
“Appa, I dint mean to offend you or Sindhu Chechi. I just thought it wouldn’t be the best idea at the moment. C’mon, think of it for a moment. Taking the tank to the hospital? Maybe a hardware store would be better!” I implored.
“Stop calling her that! Just because she has some water retention, it does not give you the freedom to call her that!” Shouted Appa.
Some water retention? Well, hello… that’s what a tank is supposed to do for crying out loud! And come to think of it, the problem in the first place and the reason why all of us are at the edge of our seats is because the blooming tank can’t retain enough water!
“And what do you mean hardware store!?” Continued Appa.
“Well, it’s the best place to get the tools for the ‘treatment’. Saws, screwdrivers, M-Seal etc ” I replied.
“Oh my goodness! Son, just listen to yourself. Are you in your right mind? Are you drunk? Are you on weed?” wailed Appa.
I couldn’t understand. Why was this so difficult for him to comprehend?
“Put Amma on the phone, ill talk to her” I told Appa.
Amma tends to be a bit more calm about things.
“Oh no you don’t! don’t you dare say all this to your poor mother!”
“No Appa. I promise, I wont say anything wrong.”
Well, to be honest. I dint know what part of it all was wrong. I knew I had to be careful. I couldn’t get Amma all worried too.
“Hello, Son, what did you tell Appa to get him so worried? And what’s all this about you being drunk and on weed?” Amma sounded anxious.
“No Amma, its all some big misunderstanding. I’m not drunk or on weed. I was just telling Appa how best to handle the situation.”
“Whatever it is, ill talk to you later. We really need to get to the hospital now. Bye!”
And she slammed the phone down. Hospital? Again? Has everyone in this world except me gone mad?
Well, after six nail biting hours when I was blacked out from my family, I finally got a call from my dad.
My sister had finally given birth to a healthy baby boy.
And that’s when it all finally dawned on me!!!
I’m proud and honoured to introduce to you my nephew, Born 17th March, 2008
Joshua Mathew George :)
On What Is Happening in Bangladesh
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As a connoisseur of cringe, I have, over the years, kept a watchful eye on
the Bangladeshi film industry: be it buxom dames charging at hanging
tomatoes to...
4 months ago
7 comments:
mone dinesha nee oru sambhavam thanna ketta.
athu mathra all nee puli aannnuu puli.
u r provin it again n again.....
only u cn b like ths...
nywys convey my wishes to the proud couple....
the baby is soooooo cuteeee
hahah! man shut up! ...you knew what "water broke" meant!!! right?
try your hand in script writing...:-)
Anyways, congrats to you and your family...
cute li'l nephew of yours... shares his B'day with me...!!!!!!
Born on 17th...like me.. he is also going to be a great visionary, thinker... *tee*
Can i just say 'Speeeeeeeeeeeeechless' :)
Aren't you the smarty pants?
wonder what you will do when ur child is born.
More importantly, do you know how a child is born? or do u still believe the Stork story?
This is the cutest baby ever
such a cuteeee baby...
Good isnt that explanation a bit too elaborated so as to take out the cream of humor....:-) Kid is too kute....
cheers
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