Friday, June 20, 2008

Reliance... Reliance... why art thou so Unreliance...

I was again out of action due to my dada card having stopped working... This time for a whole 5 days and counting!! I’ve bitched about reliance before.. And a plan to continue doing the same. I mean they are so inefficient that they don’t deserve to stay in business. Infact, its amazing hey still are!

Once I found that my data card wasn’t working, I made a lot of frantic calls to their customer care. Reliance Customer Care is one of a kind, let me tell you that. And I’m pretty darn glad they are... Coz they truly suck at it! Here is a transcript of a couple of my calls. (Honestly, there is no fudging here... These were more or less actual conversations)

Call 1

Me: “Hi, my num is so-n-so, my data card is not working”
Cust care person: “We are very delighted to have your call”

What?! They should not be delighted at getting complaint calls. Its as if they are creating complaints just to delight themselves.

Me: “Right... In the mean time, I’m not able to connect to the net”
Cust care person: “I see that you have been using this for almost 2 months now.”
Me: “Yes”
Cust care person: “Are you sure you have the right settings?”

You should appreciate how much I have matured over the years to keep my cool at this point!

Me: ”Obviously, how else could I have been using the card all this while?!”
Cust care person: ”Ok, what operating system do you use?”
Me: “OS X”
Cust care person: ”No sir, Operating system... Like windows XP, Vista”
Me: “OS X... Mac OS X”
Cust care person: {curt reply} “We don’t service Macintosh”
Me: “What do you mean you don’t service? You sold me the modem for Mac!”
Cust care person: {curt reply} “We don’t service Macintosh”

And the call got disconnected. Yes, really! The way they avoided Mac, You would think Mac was some kind of medieval disease or something!!

Call 2

Me: “Hi, my num is so-n-so, I’m not able to connect to the net”
Cust care person: “Sure sir, I help you with data card”
Me: “Thanks, can you please take down the complaint”
Cust care person: “Sure sir. Please tell me problem”
Me: “Well... Like I said I’m not able to connect to the net”
Cust care person: “Are you connected modem?”

I could see that this conversation was going to be interesting.

Me: “Ofcourse yes...”
Cust care person: “Ok Sir, is there error message?”
Me: “Yes, error 649”
Cust care person: “Ok, I take down problem”
Me: “Thank you!”
Cust care person: “What is your OS?”
Me: “Mac OS X”
Me: {hastily} “But I have tried on Win XP too”
Cust care person: “Sorry sir, we not service you”

What the F***

Me: “WHAT?!! Why??!!”
Cust care person: “We not service Mac”
Me: “Dude... I told you I tried on an XP machine too!”
Cust care person: “Sir, It is happy that you take reliance. But we not service you”

IT is happy? What Reliance is run by some animal or something? Ofcourse! Mr Anil Ambani, the devil incarnate monster! But even his employees call him IT? Anyway, the call was cutoff again.


No comments: